Please use GoodSearch for your internet searches and select a charity (such as Dominican Sisters of Houston). Thank you.


Sunday, October 08, 2006

Before I became Catholic, it was my belief that if the marriage is unhappy, sure, divorce. "Life is short," I'd say, "why stay in an unhappy relationship?"

Now I know better. Now I understand the sacramental nature of marriage. I've had co-workers who are living with their boyfriend or girlfriend. As we adults know, this living arrangement isn't platonic. "What's marriage but a piece of paper," they'd say. Ouch. They don't understand, just as I had not understood before. And indeed, if the ONLY difference between co-habitation and marriage is a piece of paper then why would anyone ever marry? If I can get all the benefits of marriage without ever outright committing myself to you, then why would I ever commit? Co-habitation cheapens marriage.

Of course the sacramental nature of marriage doesn't exist in the consciences of those who haven't embraced/developed their relationship with God. No God, no accountability to God--it's just "you" and "me." This is also a formula for unhappiness because when disagreements arise, it becomes "you" vs. "me." So when "I" concede, "you" win. There isn't the "I concede in order to do right by God" component, that my concession is not because "you" are right; my concession is in accordance to guidelines set by a God whom BOTH you and I agree is the ultimate authority. If both parties don't share the same faith, it's not going to work very well either.

Anyhow, back to the original thought. I am now no longer so flippant about marriage or divorce.


Anonymous said...

Great article. Have you seen

They have discussed your ideas and are a great resource on marriage. You should link there.

Anonymous said...